According to some researches, the best marriages happen between peers. It implies partners of the same age or an age difference of up to 3 years. It looks like this is the ideal option, because a man and a woman will have approximately the same life experience, as well as wishes for the future. But in reality, it turns out that such partners often try to adjust their spouses to themselves, and have no desire to look for compromises. A person “pushes his own line,” considering himself more intelligent, experienced, etc.
The age difference of about 5-7 years is usually explained by psychological compatibility - boys, as you know, even in childhood grow up a little later than girls. And when the woman is younger in a relationship, the man feels more psychologically confident.
But there are couples in which the age of the partners is out of the usual framework - in one direction or the other. And the reaction of society depends precisely on where this vector is directed. As a rule, women who are older than their men receive more negative attention - in such couples they often look for some sort of catch.
But if a mature man dates a young girl, for example, the age difference between them is ten or fifteen years, then such a relationship (especially in a male environment) is considered quite prestigious. The status of such a groom in the eyes of other men almost always increases.
Why does a girl prefer to build a relationship with a man much older than herself? The most common explanation you hear is: “She is probably flattered by the money.”
Maybe you are right. When a man is stable and wealthy, she wants to live a comfortable life. Why not? If partners talk about it openly, then at least, it is honest.
But such relationships, in fact, may have many other reasons. Including lack of attention in childhood, when the girl did not receive love from her own father.
Maybe the girl herself grew up in a family where her dad was older, and she had a clear example of a harmonious family. Or, on the contrary, the father was cold and distant, or he was not living with her at all, and then the girl is looking for a substitute role for the father and lacking emotions and warmth in the relationships.
It’s a different story if there was initially some kind of psychological conflict or psychological trauma associated with the father in life—by finding a spouse in his “image and likeness,” the woman tries to subconsciously resolve her previous trauma.
In addition to complexes and childhood traumas, attraction to adult men may be associated with the benefits that they can provide.
Adult men, as a rule, have life and sexual experience, they want a family, have experience taking care of her, and bring stability and peace to a woman. Their interests are more serious, they are reasonable and level-headed. Next to such a representative of the stronger sex, the girl feels like behind a stone wall. In addition, a girl can count on the loyalty of such a partner.
There are, of course, women who just like older men.
The age is really not important for the true love. Emotional flexibility of partners, the ability to negotiate with each other - this is the main rule of compatibility.
Family happiness without work is just a romantic dream. If you don’t hear each other, don’t understand and don’t accept each other, then chemistry, unfortunately, will not help.
Relationships between people of different ages, of course, have disadvantages, but there are also advantages - additional emotions, newness of sensations, the older spouse tries to keep himself in good shape, does not allow himself to grow old. In any case, the main thing is that in such relationships the aspirations and life goals of the partners should coincide, and do not bring any additional internal discomfort.